Time to Let Go

For those of you that lived a life of sin and became saved, did you find that it was hard to let go of the things that you once loved or once did? Did becoming saved make you feel nervous and scared? Did you feel like if you stopped doing the things you once did that you would have nothing you could do for fun? Did you feel like being saved meant that you would have to be locked in the house reading the bible and fun just isn’t allowed?

Well, part of that is not understanding and the other part is the wrong perception.

How many of you that are not saved want to be saved but you haven’t gotten saved yet because you still want to party and go clubbing?  How many of you that are saved want to live a godly life but some of the stuff you have gotten yourself attached to, you don’t want to stop. For example, you still want to listen to your Beyonce CDs. Y’all (yes, I’m country), it’s time to let go.

Understanding

There is a line between godly and worldly. There is a difference between the two. As saved Christians, we are to be the light of the world. People should just see us and know that there is something different, something holy, something godly. They should see Christ when they look at us. If you truly love Christ, especially for what He did for you, you would choose those godly things over the worldly without a problem. It’s disappointing sometimes, like when I found out about what’s really behind the music we listen to or eating certain things that’s not okay in the dietary laws. I was like, “aww man!” because some of the things included in that stuff were some of my favorite things. But the choice came easy to me by asking myself this question: live ungodly so I can feel good now or live godly so I can feel good for eternity? In other words, this foolishness or my soul? The decision is easy then. Hosea 4:6 says, “My people perish for a lack of knowledge because they have rejected knowledge…” When I learn something that I didn’t know before and it is to help me be closer to God and live a more godly life, I listen and make those adjustments. I don’t want to perish because I didn’t want to listen or didn’t want people to tell me anything or receive what people were telling me because I want to stay in my comfort zone. I rather be uncomfortable now and comfortable for eternity instead of comfortable now and extremely uncomfortable for eternity! As Christians, we should want to do right. We should want to be righteous. We should want to be holy, not trying to look and sound like the world. That’s just bringing glory to ourselves. God doesn’t want your worldly stuff.

How would you like it if someone you loved gave you a gift just because, and it was specially packed for you with your name on it and when you opened it, there was rotting garbage inside? Seriously, how would feel? This is what we do to God when we offer Him up this worldly stuff. We are just humans, so imagine how He feels about you every time you say, “Turn up for Jesus!” WHAT?!?!

Understand why certain things are done the way they are. Understand what stuff REALLY mean! Especially before you offer it to God.

Perception

Okay, so we think being saved means being bored. Really? My husband and I have so much fun all the time. And we don’t have to go to the clubs, get drunk, or sleep around to have fun! There’s movies, there’s restaurants, there’s bowling allies, there’s fun parks, there’s museums, there’s miniature golf, and for my shoppers, there’s malls! This is just to name a few! Grab a GOOD friend and take a trip! Watch your favorite movie, have a movie night with friends. If you have kids, whoop their tails in some Monopoly or The Game of Life! (LOL) Now, your idea of fun may be different from my idea of fun, but if you really want to be saved and live a godly life then you need to look into what fits into that.

Also, I get so much joy from reading the bible. What always worked for me was whenever I was dealing with something, I would refer to the bible. I would find what God said about it and make my choices based on The Word. I wanted to live right, so I needed to know what “right” was. And the bible is the manual for a godly life. For example, as a teenager, I was always so angry at certain people. They would make me soooo mad and just the thought of them made me mad. I got tired of being so angry and wanted to know how to deal with it, so I opened my bible. I found James 1:19-20 “Know this my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God”, and Ecclesiastes 7:9, “Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools” and I stopped being angry right there! It’s all about the choices we make.

Once I learned directly from The Word what was good and was not, I begin to learn more on how others actually dealt with things by starting from the beginning. I began reading the bible from Genesis chapter 1. I am still in the process of that and it is amazing how reading through Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, and Numbers how the people of Israel also could not let go of Egypt. They cried out to God of Abraham, of Isaac, and  Jacob to be free from Egypt, but once they were free, they could let go of the practices of Egypt. Remember the golden calf? They had been set free from Egypt, walked across the Red Sea on dry land and still wanted to worship other gods like in Egypt (Exodus 32). But even when they came up to the Red Sea, the people of Israel was ready to go back to Egypt that fast (Exodus 14: 12). They cried again in the wilderness about being hungry (Exodus 16: 2-3) and how they had food in Egypt. In Exodus 17:3, they cried about being taken from Egypt to die of thirst. Moses had gotten fed up by the time he came back with the tablets that had the Ten Commandments on them and he saw the people had built that golden calf and was worshipping it. He threw the tablets down, breaking them because he was so upset with them. God was angry with the people of Israel so much, He was going to wipe them out several times, but because of Moses praying and interceding on their behalf, he spared them. However, God did wipe out a generation of Israel instead of all of them.

But do you realize the wrong perception here? You know the saying the grass is always greener on the other side? Do you know what that means? It means that no matter where you are in your life, you are the type of person that sees everything else as better. You leave one thing because the grass looks greener on the other side, but once you get to the other side, the side you left now looks greener and you want to go back! The people of Israel saw freedom from Egypt as the greener grass, but when they were free and had to deal with this new stuff, Egypt looked greener. No matter what side, the other side always looks greener. But my advice is, stop looking at the other side!!!

The children of Israel were too busy comparing their life in Egypt with their life of freedom that they didn’t even see what God was doing for them! He got them out of Egypt (which is what they wanted), He got them across the Red Sea by parting the waters until they ALL crossed, He fed them from nothing, He quenched their thirst from a rock! He protected them in the wilderness, He protected them in battles. He did all of that just for them! And they couldn’t see it because they were too busy looking at what they thought was greener grass.

We do the same thing! We get saved and look at the sinners and think they are having so much more fun and don’t even realize the God is protecting YOU from that shooting that’s going to happen at that club that you think you want to go to so bad. Let it go! You think you’re missing out on the latest music, but God is protecting you from the sin that the music makes you want to commit. Let it go!

A lot of times, just like the children of Israel, we are just afraid of what’s to come. Salvation may be unfamiliar territory to you and you are scared. This is where your faith has to kick in. You have to believe that God is who He says He is and that He will do what He says He will do and just go for it. If you feel a desire to pull out your bible and read, do it. If you feel a need to distance yourself from certain people in order to work on your righteousness, do it. Don’t worry. God’s  got you! And being saved doesn’t mean everything will be smiles and sunshine. We are taught that becoming saved means that everything will now be alright. Yes, it is, but things are going to be hard. But it can go smoothly if you just let go and let God handle it. Let go of the anger. Let go of the hurt. Let go of the sin. Let go of the world.

I am reminded of a scene in “Finding Nemo” (yes, I like cartoons!) where Marlin doesn’t want to let go of the whale’s tongue out of fear because he’s unsure of the outcome. Dori convinces him to let go. This is how we are sometimes. We rather stay in the whale’s mouth crying to get out but then won’t let go of the whale TO get out!

                                                           (Finding Nemo: “Time To Let Go”)

Why are we confessing God, but living a worldly life? The world didn’t die and wouldn’t die for your sins, so why would you choose it over Jesus?

“For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age” Titus 2: 11-23

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your  bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12: 1-2
 

May God Bless You,

Amy M.

Expect Even The Unexpected

Don't limit your expectations. I've made the mistake SEVERAL times expecting things to go a very specific way (y'all I've even played out in my head how conversations should go, smh) and when it doesn't happen that way, I'm left in disappointment and feeling like other people let me down. In actuality, I let myself down by limiting myself to events happening only one way. How can God really bless us and use us if we are limiting ourselves and limiting our faith? If we expect something, it should be open for whatever God has planned because his plans for us go beyond our imaginations. If it doesn't go our way, fine, God has a better way! Jeremiah 29:11 says that The Lord has plans of welfare for us and for hope. If everything always go our way, why would we need hope? (because it's not always going to go our way and we sometimes won't see the good in situations with our bare eyes until we've made it through)

Amy M.

Ladies, Where Are Your Standards?

We have got to raise our standards!!!! Wanting a guy that's rich is not high standards. Wanting a guy with his pants hanging off is not high standards. Wanting a guy that does nothing but wait for you to be his mama is not high standards. Putting up with foolishness is not high standards. High standards mean QUALITY. Wanting a man that is good all the way around, wanting a man that has goals and include YOU in their goals, wanting a man that works and put in the best effort in his work, and wanting a man that treats you like the ROYALTY that YOU ARE is quality and sticking to that and making sure that man meets those things and continue to meet them is having high standards. Women keep complaining about finding a good man and first, HE needs to find YOU, and second, raise your standards!

 Looking for superficial things like money, nice car, and how they dress is going to disappoint you. It’s easy, cheap, and looking for the quantity not the QUALITY. So you have someone that has lots and lots of money. You can buy whatever you want and feel like you are “well taken care of” but are you really? If that is all you are looking for, what about how he treats you? What about what kind of father would he be? Are you okay with having the money and the ring, but he’s connecting with other women emotionally and physically? We can’t limit our standards to one feature!

Now, I’m not saying wanting to be able to pay your bills is bad or if you end up with someone with lots of money is bad. What I’m saying is don’t limit yourself to that one thing. Also, prioritize the traits that you want. Have deal breakers. What traits are good to have for you, but you will be okay without? Which ones are a MUST and if he doesn’t have it, he wouldn’t be worth your time? I’ve had people tell me to find someone that was rich, and my question was, “Well what about other good qualities?” My personal preferences may be different from someone else’s, but I’m not going to make my preference based on someone else’s. We are entitled to what we want for us, to what we prefer for ourselves. Having lots of money is okay, but I want someone that’s my friend, that I can hang out with, that I can sit and talk to, that will spread out on the living room floor and watch movies with me. As for money, as long as he is RESPONSIBLE and WORKS HARD, the bills will get paid. It may even be God’s will that you two become wealthy TOGETHER.

What really sparked my concern was a comment a young lady made to my husband. It made him shake his head and I couldn’t help but to wonder what our young ladies are being taught to accept. This young lady asked my husband was he gay. He replied saying no. He asked her why would she ask that, and she said, “I ask that because you always wear your pants around your waste.” Are you serious? Is this what we as women have lowered ourselves to? If a guy has his pants hanging off his behind and down to his knees, it’s a sign that he’s not gay therefore you can try to snatch him up? What? Actually it is the other way around, and men with their pants where they should be should be a sign of a GENTLEMAN. But when did the dress of a gentleman become gay, and the dress of a dude showing off his nasty draws become manly??

The best standard to have is to want a man that is SAVED and follows God’s will, not his own. God’s perfect order is already set, and all we have to do is get in alignment. God is over the man, the man over his wife, the wife over the children. In other words, God leads the way, the man follows God, the wife follows her husband, and the children follow her. Some of us women have been taught or taught ourselves to not need a man, but no matter how strongly you feel about that, NOBODY can argue or change what GOD already has in order. Whatever the problem is, a conversation with God is needed. I know, I’ve been there and you couldn’t tell me nothing either! Six years ago I would have laughed if anyone told me I would be writing posts like these!

With God leading the way, you know you are in good hands, and with a man that follows God, you know you are in good hands and have a strong covering! You have all of these being protecting YOU because you are that PRECIOUS! Some proof that a man that follows God is good can be found nowhere but in the scriptures. A man that follows God is good because men are told to provide for his household or he is worse than an unbeliever (1 Timothy 5:8 ESV). Men are to show themselves in ALL respects to be a MODEL of GOOD WORKS, and in their teaching show INTEGRITY and DIGNITY (Titus 2:7 ESV). As LADIES, getting in that WORD helps us understand our roles as women and wives, and it also helps us understand what men of God are really about and what we should really look for. When setting standards, start with that BIBLE!

Look for what personality makes you happy. Then, do they do what they are suppose to do? Do they have goals and work towards those goals? Do they include your dreams in also reaching their goals? Can both of your dreams work together to reach a common goal? Is there a PEACE about this person? And there are men that work their behinds off and women, some of us bash them because they are not making $100,000 or more a year! We say they are not men! What???! Shallow thinking! What is he working toward? I'm sure he's not trying to stay in that place in his life forever! Plus, the man is WORKING! And working hard! Let them work! Sometimes, all they need to really set them on their way is that help meet like YOU. Stop bashing these guys that are trying to make things happen and you just can't see all of that. If so, go get yourself in check first. I had to.

Additional Scriptures and my quick summaries of them:

Psalms 1 1-6 (Men of God are righteous and blessed. Their household is blessed)

Joshua 1:9 (Men of God are strong and courageous)

Ephesians 5:22-25 (the role of men and wives)

Proverbs 22:29 (Girl, you better get you a hard-working man!) smile

I made a list when I was in college of what I wanted in a man (like most of us girls). I prayed and talked to God about this list and he already had the perfect guy lined up, but I had to get myself in wife-mode according to the Word of God. If I hadn’t, we would have had some serious problems in our marriage, OR God would not have brought him to me yet because I wouldn’t have been ready. Sometimes we want things so bad and we’re not even ready for them. Our standards then get compromised because we want a man sooooo bad! But you not ready. Focus on being ready and following God’s will, not your own. And if you're thinking, "Well there's not many good men out there" then if we raise these standards, these men will comply, the real ones. But we don't expect much from them or expect unrealistic things and that's what we get.

Check out my previous post about setting standards.

With nothing but love and wanting the best from and for our ladies,

Amy M.

When People Treat US Badly, And God Tells Us To Be Nice Anyway…

I’m pretty sure most of you have dealt with situations where God was shifting the people in your life and the ones that were once close to you, it was then the season to let them go and new people came into your lives. But what about when YOU feel certain people need to be let go because of something they’ve done to hurt you or constantly not line up with your beliefs and you feel the need to distance yourself and all the while, God is continuously pushing you to reach out to this person (or people)? You can’t figure out why God wants you to be nice and hold out yet another hand when this person has been nothing but the opposite for you. Maybe there is still a lesson for you or even a seed He needs you to plant before you depart from them. We always have to look at things through God’s eyes and pay attention to His will and not be all in our feelings. It’s difficult, but it’s amazing what you see and experience and even the things you don’t get to witness that were a result of your obedience and gentleness despite the situation.

Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.

Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding

Romans 12:19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord,”

2 Timothy 2:23-26 Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will. (Wow, this one really hit home! This goes back to what I was saying, sometimes there’s more that God wants done than we can see because we are caught up in the wrong things they’ve done instead of looking at how we can lead them to Christ or just plant that seed and keep it moving. It’s not about us and how we feel about the things that happen. If we do feel bad, that’s what God’s peace is for!)

People WILL do us wrong; they are PEOPLE! And we can’t get caught up in their foolishness. We have to continue to be examples of Christ even when we want to tell people about themselves in our own way! We don’t have to get caught up in people’s messes. Sometimes, God is using our responses (not reactions) to minister to them. He’s reaching out to them through us! So, when you can’t figure out why God is pushing you to not let go just yet and to do certain NICE gestures, to continue to show love and acts of kindness, think about His will, not your will. I’m also reminded of Hosea who, even after all of her wrong doings, God told Hosea to continue to love Gomer and care for her. The same for how God continued to love Israel.

There was a time when I had a friend that did unfriendly things to me. I continued to show love and kindness even though I felt I deserved better. Not once did I do or say anything negative to that person. Years later, that person came to realize how unfriendly they really were and acknowledged it to me and apologized. By then, it didn’t matter. Their well-being was all that mattered. As I look back at that, I realize that the person could have realized their wrong-doings and not bring it to me at all. God could have allowed them to have never crossed my path again, but the seed was still planted. They still saw my example of Christ. We don’t have to be present when things catch up with these people. I believe God allowed me to see this person’s regrets and remorse to let me know that your actions do make a difference. You may see it as doing nothing, but boy is it something! We can’t always know the reasons for everything. There are times when YOU want to keep giving chances and God is saying let them go. In either situation, there’s that common denominator: IT’S GOD’S WILL. We may not understand everything, but as long as we follow what He asks of us, He will keep us covered.

Amy M.

"I'm Just Being Realistic"

Ever have people in your life that when you share exciting things with them, they respond not with the same excitement, but with seriousness and say things like, “Well, I’m just being realistic.” And they start talking about how that thing could possibly not work out and how you have to prepare for the let down. WHAT??? Are you serious??? This can put a damper on your day, especially when all you wanted was a simple, “That’s great! I’m praying for you!”

I understand people not wanting to get their hopes up or wanting to make sure their loved ones are not in over their heads, but we also have to make sure that we are not being so realistic that we forget to be happy for one another. I dealt with a situation like this, and I begin to feel so discouraged and wondering should I not be excited, should I be looking at all the negative things that could happen and plan according to that? It was like no one wanted to be happy for me and wanted to tell me about how terrible things COULD be.

To some people, being realistic means you are always planning for the worst and if something bad can happen, it will so you better be ready. But to me, realistic means you work together with God. You do your part, work within your means, learn, grow and God watches your faithfulness and your trust in Him, and He provides. We ask for it, work towards it and He is already making it happen (if it is His will). He’s just waiting on us to get there. Therefore, I don’t even like to say “realistic”. I like to say “faith” and “common sense”(smile).

But when good things are happening, why not praise God for it?! Why not be excited?! Why not celebrate and shout for joy?! Especially if it was a long trial, then you are also celebrating the fact that you made it through. One of my favorite songs as a little girl was “How I Got Over” by Tramaine Hawkins. So as a little girl, I understood that some things are going to be hard, but you can’t dwell in that. You have to keep going, with that beautiful smile on your face, until you make it out. Then, you’re able to look back and go, “wow, I made it through all of THAT? Only God!!” and get your praise on!

Why do we try to hold on to those trials? “Well, I can’t try this because the last time I did something, this happened and I’m not trying to let that happen again.” How many of us say things like this? Let’s start by changing our attitudes. We have to ask God to renew our minds. Our mindsets need to be more like, “Well, this happened before, so I need to make sure I do this and that to make sure it doesn’t happen again and Lord I thank you!” Negative people (that call themselves realistic) are just letting previous experiences keep them from moving, from growing where people with faith learn from those experiences and make smarter choices next time and with that trust in God, they keep it moving.

Also, sometimes we act on things God DID NOT tell us to do! Here’s a great way to tell the difference:

                God telling you to do it or it’s going to happen: “There’s this constant tug on my heart to do this thing.” “God just gave me a peace and a sense of happiness about this thing.” “Whenever I pray to God (Yah) about this thing, this other thing always drops into my spirit.”

                God not telling you do it or it’s not suppose to happen: “Well, I know this is wrong, but I’m going to do it anyway.” “I just have this heaviness in my spirit about this thing, but I just can’t stop.” “This is bad for me in the long run, but it feels so good at the moment.”

We know it when we are choosing to go about things the wrong way. But when we are working towards something promised and those trials come along, here’s your learning experience. God is testing you, stretching you, and growing you. Don’t take it as, “Oh I messed up, I’m not trying anymore! I’m a failure!” It may feel like that sometimes, but as long as you have faith in God, meaning you trust Him enough to keep going even though it looks bad and the people around you are saying you are foolish to take that leap, you will be alright. Despite what’s going on around you, you keep it going. God’s plans go beyond our craziest imaginations! Why be “realistic” (believing in the visual things, trusting in your surroundings, dwelling on your circumstance) when you can trust in God and your blessings are even more than you could even think to ask for?!

That negative thinking is based on the fear of failing. The bible says, “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:7 ESV). Always saying things won’t work, or dwelling on how it could go badly is not of God, not righteousness. God said, “ Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10 ESV).  If a situation begins to look scary, we have to be in constant prayer and hold tightly to God. He will help us. He will help you! So, distance yourself from those negative thinking people and move closer to God and what He says, and if you are one of those negative thinking people, ask God to renew your mind and to give you the wisdom to deal with different situations and with other people. You will thank Him for it.

Amy M.

The Sabbath

This is my first post on this blog. After setting up the blog, I had to decide what I wanted to start off talking about. What would make a great first post? When I reached this topic, it wasn’t an extraordinary moment. Simply put, today is the Sabbath.  I’ve created this blog during the Sabbath during my day of resting, worshiping and in The Word. This entire idea came from me praying for a solution to reach people and for people to reach back. We are living in the last days and we keep hearing and saying that, but we are! Body of Christ, we have to do better! We have to do more! More needs to be said! More needs to be explained! So this idea of blogging to reach people came about during my prayer and meditation while observing the Sabbath.

Let’s talk about the Sabbath now. We all mention the Sabbath when we say “Even God rested on the seventh day” (Genesis 2:1-3), but there are several other references to the Sabbath throughout the Bible. It is even one of the Ten Commandments. My question is why? Why is it so important? My husband and I began observing the Sabbath day and felt more like we were in bondage. We were like, “We can’t do this, and we can’t do that. We can’t do this either!” So, we had to seek God and understand what exactly his purpose is for the Sabbath. My husband and I began to reach that understanding at about the same time but in different ways. I was reading through Exodus and reached the part where God was explaining that they (Israel) need to observe the Sabbath.

Exodus 16:22-30 (ESV) On the sixth day they gathered twice as much bread, two omers each. And when all the leaders of the congregation came and told Moses, he said to them, “This is what the Lord has commanded: “Tomorrow is a day of solemn rest, a holy Sabbath to the Lord; bake what you will bake and boil what you will boil, and all that is left over lay aside to be kept till morning.’” So they laid it aside till the morning, as Moses commanded them, and it did not stink, and there were no worms in it. Moses said, “Eat it today, for today is a Sabbath to the Lord; today you will not find it in the field. Six days you will gather it, but on the seventh day, which is a Sabbath, there will be none.” On the seventh day some of the people went out to gather, but they found none. And the Lord said to Moses, “How long will you refuse to keep my commandments and my laws? See! The Lord has given you the Sabbath; therefore on the sixth day he gives you bread for two days. Remain each of you in his place; let no one go out of his place on the seventh day.” So the people rested on the seventh day.

This is where it all made sense to me. God gave us the Sabbath day. A gift. It is good for us. It is a day of rest. He wants us to REST! I messed up because we can be so career driven, work driven and don’t want to just sit down because we “have too much to do.” That was my mistake. I was thinking from the perspective of “I can’t do anything!” when it should have been “I need to get everything done, so I can relax tomorrow!” God had Israel gather double on the sixth day in order to be prepared and comfortable on the seventh day. I thought, “That’s it! I need to make sure everything is done during the week, then on the seventh day I can rest with no worries, no still wondering what needs to be done. But this is why we have the Sabbath because if it were not for it, we would never stop and smell the roses, as they say! I thank God for the Sabbath day, a day of rest, prayer, worship, study, and just spending that time with God. We are still learning the proper way to observe the day and getting out of the habit of what was normal routine. Here are some links to help in your studies on the Sabbath that I have found helpful:
http://www.openbible.info/topics/the_sabbath_day

 http://yrm.org/Honorthesabbathday.htm

Feel free to add your thoughts!