"I'm Just Being Realistic"

Ever have people in your life that when you share exciting things with them, they respond not with the same excitement, but with seriousness and say things like, “Well, I’m just being realistic.” And they start talking about how that thing could possibly not work out and how you have to prepare for the let down. WHAT??? Are you serious??? This can put a damper on your day, especially when all you wanted was a simple, “That’s great! I’m praying for you!”

I understand people not wanting to get their hopes up or wanting to make sure their loved ones are not in over their heads, but we also have to make sure that we are not being so realistic that we forget to be happy for one another. I dealt with a situation like this, and I begin to feel so discouraged and wondering should I not be excited, should I be looking at all the negative things that could happen and plan according to that? It was like no one wanted to be happy for me and wanted to tell me about how terrible things COULD be.

To some people, being realistic means you are always planning for the worst and if something bad can happen, it will so you better be ready. But to me, realistic means you work together with God. You do your part, work within your means, learn, grow and God watches your faithfulness and your trust in Him, and He provides. We ask for it, work towards it and He is already making it happen (if it is His will). He’s just waiting on us to get there. Therefore, I don’t even like to say “realistic”. I like to say “faith” and “common sense”(smile).

But when good things are happening, why not praise God for it?! Why not be excited?! Why not celebrate and shout for joy?! Especially if it was a long trial, then you are also celebrating the fact that you made it through. One of my favorite songs as a little girl was “How I Got Over” by Tramaine Hawkins. So as a little girl, I understood that some things are going to be hard, but you can’t dwell in that. You have to keep going, with that beautiful smile on your face, until you make it out. Then, you’re able to look back and go, “wow, I made it through all of THAT? Only God!!” and get your praise on!

Why do we try to hold on to those trials? “Well, I can’t try this because the last time I did something, this happened and I’m not trying to let that happen again.” How many of us say things like this? Let’s start by changing our attitudes. We have to ask God to renew our minds. Our mindsets need to be more like, “Well, this happened before, so I need to make sure I do this and that to make sure it doesn’t happen again and Lord I thank you!” Negative people (that call themselves realistic) are just letting previous experiences keep them from moving, from growing where people with faith learn from those experiences and make smarter choices next time and with that trust in God, they keep it moving.

Also, sometimes we act on things God DID NOT tell us to do! Here’s a great way to tell the difference:

                God telling you to do it or it’s going to happen: “There’s this constant tug on my heart to do this thing.” “God just gave me a peace and a sense of happiness about this thing.” “Whenever I pray to God (Yah) about this thing, this other thing always drops into my spirit.”

                God not telling you do it or it’s not suppose to happen: “Well, I know this is wrong, but I’m going to do it anyway.” “I just have this heaviness in my spirit about this thing, but I just can’t stop.” “This is bad for me in the long run, but it feels so good at the moment.”

We know it when we are choosing to go about things the wrong way. But when we are working towards something promised and those trials come along, here’s your learning experience. God is testing you, stretching you, and growing you. Don’t take it as, “Oh I messed up, I’m not trying anymore! I’m a failure!” It may feel like that sometimes, but as long as you have faith in God, meaning you trust Him enough to keep going even though it looks bad and the people around you are saying you are foolish to take that leap, you will be alright. Despite what’s going on around you, you keep it going. God’s plans go beyond our craziest imaginations! Why be “realistic” (believing in the visual things, trusting in your surroundings, dwelling on your circumstance) when you can trust in God and your blessings are even more than you could even think to ask for?!

That negative thinking is based on the fear of failing. The bible says, “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:7 ESV). Always saying things won’t work, or dwelling on how it could go badly is not of God, not righteousness. God said, “ Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10 ESV).  If a situation begins to look scary, we have to be in constant prayer and hold tightly to God. He will help us. He will help you! So, distance yourself from those negative thinking people and move closer to God and what He says, and if you are one of those negative thinking people, ask God to renew your mind and to give you the wisdom to deal with different situations and with other people. You will thank Him for it.

Amy M.